How to defuse conflict in the workplace

By Chris Amorosino

Workplace conflict is bad for your business. “In the workplace, disrespect and conflict are not only human problems, but profit issues,” says Dr. Allan Schiffer of the Pathways Group in Hartford. 

Other experts on workplace relationships agree. “People don’t perform because of their salary,” says Dr. Jeff Zimmerman of Avon’s Beacon Behavioral Services LLC. “They perform because of their motivation. When you have conflict or dissension within the company, people do not produce at their highest level.” 

Conflict: much more than violence

Conflict in the workplace often brings to mind violent acts, but Dr. Zimmerman believes it’s important to understand that conflict is much more inclusive. It includes many more subtle actions such as rumor mongering, taking sides, isolating certain employees, treating some people with disrespect, verbal abuse and passive-aggressive actions. Often these actions can become a pattern and institutionalize conflict within the workplace. 

Although practices like favoritism or harassment may seem less serious than violence, they are much more prevalent and can be extremely harmful to employees and the organization itself.

In addition, unresolved minor conflicts or poor employee practices can snowball into greater and greater aggressive and violent acts. For example, by putting up with what may seem like minor verbal abuse, an employer silently sanctions that abuse, rewarding the abuser’s behavior and alienating or driving away good employees. 

What to do

Conflict can’t always be avoided, but here are a few suggestions for reducing its impact and increasing employee productivity.

1. Get educated. In particular, company leaders, supervisors and managers should be trained in conflict-management skills. Dr. Schiffer says many supervisors don’t know how to respond to conflict, so they ignore it. They may hope that the conflict will go away on its own, or they may think that raising the issue will make things worse. Neither is true. 

2. Adopt a zero-tolerance policy. Workplaces with the least amount of harassment, abuse and conflict are those where company policy and senior management behavior make it clear that none will be allowed. Don’t tolerate hostility, fighting or aggression. This includes hurtful actions like name calling, yelling or passive-aggressive actions.

3. Show respect. Listen openly to employee ideas and opinions. Thank employees for their thoughts, and never dismiss anyone’s ideas in a way that might be perceived as showing a lack of interest in those ideas.

4. Seek to understand both sides of any conflict. To resolve a disagreement and avoid conflict, you need to understand each party’s position and value it. This demands active listening.

5. Be willing to be wrong. Often conflict escalates because people’s egos get in the way and they need to be right. Dr. Zimmerman tells businesspeople to forget about being right and concentrate on doing what’s best for the company. Doing what’s best may be different from doing what you think is right. 

6. Allow people to be different. Healthy companies acknowledge people’s differences in areas like race, culture and religion. They don’t try to change people. Instead, they see value in the synergy that comes from having people from widely varying backgrounds and beliefs.

7. Practice good communication skills. Communicate expectations clearly. Avoid communicating with blame or criticism. Take responsibility for words and actions and how they affect others. If someone thinks you’ve abused them, then you have, and you need to work on resolution.

8. Stay calm. If conflict erupts, remain cool and objective so you don’t add fuel to the fire. Don’t try to touch an upset or angry employee, because touching can be perceived as hostile and aggressive. Try to clearly understand the root of the conflict and offer support to both parties. 

“Corporations invest to a great degree in technology training, but I think they also need to invest in training in human interaction,” says Dr. Zimmerman. “Our biggest resource in companies is our people. We need to recognize that managers, as well as other employees, need to be more than technical experts — they also need to know how to lead and how to manage people effectively.” 

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